Joe Biden, Take Two


I’ll see your Sarah Palin resignation speech, and raise you a Joe Biden commencement address:

I believe so strongly, as you may recall when I was here in October, not in you particularly but your generation…

…you’re about to graduate into a point in history where everything is going to change no matter what you do, but you can affect the change.

You’re going to walk across this stage without knowing for certain what’s on the other side.

…there’s not a single solitary decision confronting your generation now that doesn’t yield a change from non-action as well as action.

Non-action is action, unlike most generations.

There’s not a single issue on this President’s plate that will not yield a change — just merely by ignoring it, it will change.

They voted for change, not certain what it would mean, but convicted in the assumption that we cannot sustain the path we’re on.  (“convicted in the assumption?”)

And our own interpretive muse:

Joe Biden Take 2
By Tarzana Joe

I’m so glad you could rejoin me
Two days after graduation
And I thank you so sincerely
For postponing your vacation
And it gives me satisfaction
That you’ve gathered here today
So I can tell you plainly
What I really meant to say

Hey, they call this a commencement
But it’s not a new beginning
Just like bringing in a lefty
Halfway through the seventh inning
See, the game’s not starting over
But that pitcher hasn’t thrown yet
So the batter’s seeing pitches
That the pitcher hasn’t shown yet

Just like we can’t see tomorrow
But I’ll bet the sun is rising
That’s why it’s called the future
Cause its always so surprising

So the point that I’ve been making
Is that change is on the way
For the very simple reason
That tomorrow’s not today

And each new daybreak dawning
Brings with it its own revision
Consequently then deciding
Is the same as indecision

But the point about decisions
Is that they can be divisive
So if you refuse to make them
You’re not being indecisive

Are you better understanding
All these concepts I’m expressing?
But, hey people, wait a minute
There I go again digressing
I’m not fond of public speaking
And in point of fact, it hurts
You try speaking off the cuff
When you’re wearing short sleeve shirts
And in all my public service
Neck pain’s always been a factor
And as soon as I’m done speaking
I go see a chiropractor

Literally.

Should I speak a little louder
For the people sitting nearer?
Wow, I hope you got the message
‘Cause I really can’t be clearer.

Play

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