We subscribe to a nifty little service called Street Events, which makes available earning releases, and almost instant transcripts of corporate earnings conference calls. I needed to go down to the Courthouse to file some paperwork, and knowing the line would be staffed by a single underpayed civil "servant," I took along a preliminary transcript of a call that I need to write up.
"Preliminary" is generous. The thing looks as though it was created either by someone barely conversant in the English language, or by Version 0.2 of dictation software, programmed by someone who was barely conversant in English. Either or both are completely possible, but it renders picking through the transcript an Adventure in Homophones. (Thurber had a similar problem at one point.) Consider the following:
I'm reinforce way made in the prees also those related to sale growth and the affect that copper and pressure metal have had on sale and I'll review our acquisitionings have had on the quarter and the accounting treatments affects the year over year comparisons. Then aisle review the outlook...
Or:
Good afternoon. The first Gordon before he took off he was pushing all the mu products which finally hit in 06 are there products you are stock marketed to accentuate 07 growth.Of course that's the mole of the company.
I think the mole of the company was busy preparing this transcript.
I don't want to make too much of this. A better transcript will be available soon, and when it is, I'll let you know what the hell these people were saying to each other, because I certainly can't figure it out.